Modern communication between a husband and wife

This is Sean’s new tattoo. The bull is the old logo for the Belleville Bulls, the OHL team closest to our hometown.

Here’s the story of how he ended up getting it today, and how I found out about it.

Sean and our friend Jason had made plans to go to Toronto’s Fan Expo today. They got all the way down there and discovered hordes of people in long lines that weren’t moving anywhere. They walked through various open doors to find more lines of people (many dressed up as their favourite character from whatever fandom they enjoy best). There were lines to buy tickets. There were lines to get in after those tickets were purchased. They decided that waiting in all those lines wasn’t worth their time. So they left.

What’s with all this buildup? I’ll get to that.

So apparently they wandered around downtown for awhile, visiting the Silver Snail, having a couple of beers at The Bier Markt, and buying cigars at Frank Correnti Cigars. So, it was a good guy’s day out. After a quick visit with a friend of Jason’s who works in the area they were in, they ended up in a tattoo shop. Sean has been considering getting a tattoo in commemoration of Flora’s birth. He’s been struggling with the image as I don’t think he’s keen on getting a flower (the meaning of the name Flora) tattooed on him, and wanted to make sure any tattoo he did get was the right one. (I’ve tried to veto the use of a fireflower for Super Mario Brothers with her name and birthdate underneath, but I need to remember that it’s not my body – I just have to look at it.)

So they were looking at the different designs in the shop when Jason (ever the good friend), points out the sample of the original Belleville Bulls logo. Sean has always said that if he won the lottery, he would buy the Belleville Bulls – he’s that big a Bull Booster. So he was excited to see the Bulls logo in tattoo form, and once he saw that artwork, made an appointment right away to get it put on his calf.

Keep in mind that I don’t know any of this is happening right now. I’m home with Flora thinking that these two are spending too much money on GI Joe action figures and getting their pictures taken with Star Wars characters and Transformers.

At about 6PM, Jason and Sean come in. Jason is in first and gives me a very low-key “hi”. I ask what’s going on, and he kinda points at Sean, mumbling that something happened to him. As he hobbled through the door, I see that Sean is all bandaged up. “What the hell happened to you?” I ask (it was more sympathetic than it sounds). Sean then tells me that he was hit by a cyclist while walking downtown and it scraped up his leg really bad. They flagged down a paramedic driving by and he bandaged it up. Shocked and worried, I ask if he’s all right and if he needs stitches or followup care. He says it needs to be wrapped until tomorrow, but he’s essentially okay – the pebbles have been cleaned out and the wound looks dressed enough that it won’t leak all over the couch or sheets.

The evening progresses and I put Flora to bed. Once she is down, I go on my computer in the next room to kill time while making sure that Flora is really going down for the night. I open up Facebook and I see that Sean has updated his profile picture. To the picture you see above.

I know Sean is a big Bulls fan, but I think to myself “it’s tacky to use someone else’s tattoo as your profile photo”. When I looked closer, I thought to myself “holy shit, that’s *my* couch in the background of that photo”. I go downstairs and make the following statement:

“I had to find out you got a new tattoo via Facebook?”

Big laughs all around. They wondered how long it would take me to find out. Turns out I found out about two minutes after the photo was posted. There was no teenage cyclist who ran my husband down. The two of them concocted that story on the way home.

It’s a good thing I checked Facebook tonight. I had planned to write a Twitter status, complaining about assholes on bikes who run down people and don’t even stay to apologize or help the victim get up. And that would have been posted to Facebook too.

And that would have just looked silly, given what I know now. Our friends would think we never talk to each other.

3 thoughts on “Modern communication between a husband and wife”

  1. It's an interesting tale and I empathize, but what you have to understand is that your husband has acquired more than just a tattoo today….

    He's now untouchable in that building (The Quinte Sports Center…oh excuse me….the “Yardmen Arena”) or most anywhere on the property…

    He's above the law…

    They can go ahead and just ask for him for $3.00 for a slice of pizza pizza…..He'll tell them he's not paying for it….. just before pulling up his pant leg………Yes sir…here's your pizza …and your change.

    Security can't harass him either….

    “Where's your ticket sir?” Under my pant leg.

    A Toonie for parking in Belleville, Ontario? Not today my good man..

    “Sir those pants are too short for…….Oh……excuse me….nevermind…..didn't realize it was you Mr. Mitchell”.
    He could walk up to a guard and slug him square in the mouth and then lift the pant leg…….they'll apologize to him.

    He no longer has to ask for balcony seats…..he can demand them.
    (See “Balcony please” as now “Balcony, now”. It's part of the new rule)

    He doesn't have to wait in line at the urinals anymore during intermissions…..not that I recall him ever leaving his seat to do so.

    Everyone wins….


Leave a Reply

Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 2.5 Canada
This work by Melissa Price-Mitchell is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 2.5 Canada.
%d bloggers like this: